uhu ... i am here

anyways i updated my homepage again ....

and i am currently dateing a really nice lovely woman named Marlene

and i cleaned out parts of my adpartment .... LOL ... i have a kitchen again !!

(i mean ... i removed ALL big mashines that where in my way ... like the mixer and the shredder and the late 70th toaster ... and the bread thingy to make toasts in ... i dont eat toasts so why in hell should i take up valuble space in my kitchen ? .... )


eventfull day ! i am also a room owner in camfrog atm together whith my brother Soul_Clog ... My name there is now _Missy_ and the rooms name is... Heavens_Playground

tomorrow is a big day ... audition 2 ... and i am nervous !
Make it or flake it ?
thats the biggest fear i have at the moment ...

This is the Typical theme of my homepage ! 
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My dogtag ! i love it !!! its cool !! 

My signature file for some forums ! 

Camfrog Predator - Your powerfull admin tools

Camfrog Predator - Your powerfull admin tools



check this link out if your using camfrog and a operator in a room ! it will knock your socks off !

The dark zone

i realized something today
when i found a old community that i used to belong to in 1998 ...

i wasent the nicest person on the planet...
and thank god i grew out of that shit ..
this is one of the presentations i had .... translated over to english

~~~~
Hi there !
i am a Synth Punk Goth Slut and i do what i want when i want it
if i had to decribe myself i would say that ...
im a toufh bitch to be around ... my way or the highway...
and i love to be in the center of everyones hate

i am bisexual so now you dont have to worry about that ethier ...
i fuck around and i do it whith pride...

i figured it out when i was 12 even tho one of my dimwitted exes havent figured that out yet ... its not a fucking trend thing for me as it is for him
im not the trendy conviniant bisexual male as he is ....and just becouse his idea of it is a bit diffrent it dosent have to mean that i follow his trends ... i have better things to do then to just argue about sex trends whith a stupid fucktard as him

i like to be fucked and to wear uniforms and tie up others draw blood get tied up myself ... inflict pain on others and get some of the pain myself ...more then that you dont need to know about my sexlife...

Me me and more of ... Me....

Sad
depressed
happy
love life
hate life
thinking
stupid
dimwitted
mean
bimbo at heart
want everything to be diffrent
hates everything and everyone
cuts herself
anti everything
cryes
sees the ironi in everything
hugs and kisses
complexed
selfdestructive
unhappy
positive
joyful
cuddles
sparks
overjoyed
pathetic
awake
tierd
comfort
comforts
smiles
laufhs
closes my eyes and whishes that i never was born....

~~~~

i can only say that .... i must have lived in a twiligthzone the last 5 years becouse reading all that from 1998 scared the shit out of me ...
but the only thing that DID make me smile was a comment from Peter ... from when i was 16 .... i also found a old hand written letter among my things that i forgot i had ....

Best quote by Peter that made me smile like hell

Marina ..... your so serious dont you know that "Life is short and love is always over in the morning", thats so well known to our kind and for Sisters of Mercy fans all over the world


//Missy

A open Letter to Sebastian

its so simple even a 5 year old could figure this out ....
i don't want you in my life
you made my life a living hell from the first time you hit me to the last time...
i reallycouldn'tt see how we could be whith eatchother
and i reallydon'tt understand why you almost killed me ...
ididn'tt cheat around and did everything you told me to dowithoutt even thinking ....

but in the samesensee i have to thank you ...
if it wherent for you i would never had known i was sick...
and if it wherent for you i would NEVER had known my true value as a human

~~~~off topic stuff~~~~
i had depressions before you and i think you knew that they started when i was around 10 and had to switch school... from a nice frienldly everyone know everyone school to a hard toufh school that everyone stayed forthemselvessbecausee noone was a sligthet equal to eatchother ...Everyonee was stuck up snobs ... INCLUDING ME even tho i was just a bit more openminded anddidn'tt care what everyone said about my friends .... justbecausee they came from the same area as me ... i sticked by their sides as any friend would no matter what... sure some of the girls couldent stand me becouse i had a own definition about how life was supposed to be .... and sure some of the guys where asshole bullies ...but that all changed becouse i sat my foot down and refused to be treated like shit by them ..
~~~rant off~~~

So what in hell gave you the rigth to destroy my life ?
was it the fact that i was still stuck in my past or was it the fact that i am bi and had a couple of ex girlfriends living close to where we lived ?
or was it even more simple ... you got tierd of me and thougth that the best sollution was to kill me off ?

i really wounder how your mind works ...

but i do know one thing .... THANK GOD your still locked up
i hope you rot in that jail ... even tho i know that jailtime for you is just another cool thing to tell your buddies about .

but you should also know what i know ... i know that you have a really easy life behind those bars ... you get better food then most schools and most older persons that realys on the goverment .. i think a russian prison would have beeing better for you ... i hear they have worse living standard then we in sweden .... you would be lucky to have water and bread over there ...

ya

You scored as Satanism. Your beliefs most closely resemble those of Satanism! Before you scream, do a bit of research on it. To be a Satanist, you don't actually have to believe in Satan. Satanism generally focuses upon the spiritual advancement of the self, rather than upon submission to a deity or a set of moral codes. Do some research if you immediately think of the satanic cult stereotype. Your beliefs may also resemble those of earth-based religions such as paganism. atheism 100% Paganism 100% Satanism 100% Buddhism 100% agnosticism 67% Hinduism 50% Islam 33% Judaism 21% Christianity 17% Which religion is the right one for you? (new version) created with QuizFarm.com

A friend from Camfrog made this uber cute drawing of me ! (love thee DAWG_) 

More then a Year in pics 

The Welcome pic from my homepage !

just follow the link ... ill edit this =) 

moved up the scale (becouse i feelt like it)

A really Southpark Inspierd Missy .... be careful do not aggrivate this cartoon ! she bites !

So yeah ! this is my ... Future ! behold !

My future tattoo on my back .... just above my ass crack !
i think its pretty neat ... took me about 10 years to finally complete it !
but now its done !

i just need to get inked !!!!